(of course, to each their own thoughts about the multiverse. he supposes he could see it how scott sees it - there are so many bad things in gwen's world for him to be totally fine with it wholly. but to him, in his position, these multiverses mean something completely different. rather of a proof of what can go wrong, they are a proof something can go right.
one chance in fourteen million.)
I mean, man, it's a whole thing, scientifically and otherwise, right? But I get it, because you don't know where the similarities start and stop, so you gotta wonder what is happening around and what does that mean to you, is that what you've been thinking?
[...Maybe Peter hopes for things to be different in another universe, considering that things have gone horribly in his. He mentioned aliens and Thanos killing a whole bunch of people-- including him. So, maybe he wants to be optimistic about Gwen's world and stuff in comparison. For a moment, Scott feels kind of bad for whining about this in the first place, but guess it's too late to take it back now.
There's that grief though, knowing his friend is dead back home. Why can't things be better for his friends?? It really fucking sucks.]
Yeah, something like that. Especially if... like there's something you learn about the future in another world that you really don't like. [His frown increases despite himself. He... he doesn't want to kill Charles Xavier.]
(unfortunately for all involved, peter was raised to believe in the best of things, in the best of people, regardless of their circumstances, that they can be better if they want to - all they need is help. optimistic by nature, no beating will put him down for too long.
so, if there's something about another world that he doesn't like...)
I mean, man. No story is finished telling, right? There's always hope for things to be better. Maybe you don't like it, and that's totally fine, right, but you don't know what will happen in the future of that future, so like, maybe it will all turn out okay, right?
-- That future of that future part didn't help my case, but you know what I mean. The super future--
[Yeah, he gets what Peter is trying to say. Maybe not the most eloquent way to put it, but Scott doesn't need that in the first place. He never has. And so the mutant stays quiet for a moment, turning his words around in his mind, trying to pull that same optimism and hope from them that his friend truly seems to believe in. ...This is really coming from a guy that's dead back home, where the universe seems to be half destroyed, but he still really believes, huh?
If he can, maybe Scott can. ...He should.
Even if he kills Professor Xavier, maybe... it will somehow still be okay. It feels grim, but guess the Scott in Quentin's timeline is trying his best. Finally, he breathes out, focusing on Peter with genuine curiosity.]
I gotta have. It's not even for me, I'm fine-- well, not fine, fine, but you get it, fine. The wizard said there's a chance in four million that we win, and I just think-- I gotta believe that chance is ours, you know? If I don't, I'm giving up on half the universe, and the people I believe in, right, and that's... Not right. I do get a little bummed, because I mean. I'm... Pretty dead, right, there's no coming back from that, but while I'm here, I can make you sandwiches, and spend time with Mr. Murdock plural, and help androids, and call Mr. Valentine a vampire and make Gwen smile a little. That's gotta be worth something, it just gotta be.
(perhaps a little more long-winded than he wanted to go with, but nevertheless, it's how he feels. he can't predict tomorrow, but he can hope. he can wake up each morning and try to help, make a difference, even if this is-- a videogame? a simulation? the people in here are real to him.
Those are really, really bad odds but guess they're not impossible odds either? If Peter still has hope for the future, even if he's not a part of it, then Scott isn't going to point out how slim that possibility is. Besides, Peter is the math nerd between them, he already knows and still chooses to believe and... he's a strong guy, isn't he? It's not because he's just Spider-Man either.
He bumps his shoulder against Peter's, a smile twitching at the corners of his mouth. Look, he really is in full agreement with him.]
It is worth something. Being here. Making friends with others.
[He fully believes it, he has to. All the friends he has here, his girlfriend... all that is truly worth something, even if it won't necessarily last forever. It still matters.] What we do here still matters.
(it seems like he helped unsour scott's mood, which is a win in his book. it's easy to get lost in the doom and gloom, but that's the thing - peter always stands up. he's starting to realize that's a normal theme for the spider-people. it no longer confuses him, instead, it feels like a simple fact of life. there will be good scott summers, there will be back scott summers - it's the experiences that led him anywhere. the same way there's a peter parker who wanted the attention and love gwen has to offer that he turned himself into a lizard to try and feel a little more special like her.
he couldn't ever imagine himself.)
I think, so, too. If this is the only home I will ever get now, then I'll make it my home. It matters to me.
[Don't be sad about Peter, at least not right in front of him. If he's being this strong about his fate and everything, then Scott will be so too. Not to mention, he's pretty familiar being around people that are dead back home... not that it makes it that much easier.
He holds up his lemonade, however, holding it up to Peter with a small smile. He'll get through his feelings and at the very least, support his friend. Make sure that he has a good time at this new 'home.' It matters to him too.]
Kind of prefer a lot of things in this new home anyway. Hot girlfriend and all.
(clink, and he drinks it. he much prefers the lemonade, he won't lie, instead of alcohol. tastes weird, does very little! so, he even sways his legs a little as they dangle from the roof, a laugh leaving him when he hears the comment.)
I mean, can't complain either, not by far. Gwen's, uh, pretty amazing. We already decided to stop trying to keep our identities to ourselves, so I can actually tell you she's also a Spider. I thought I was alone all this time, but I'm not. It's pretty sweet.
[There really is something so normal about this. Drinking lemonade while sitting with a friend, even though the edge of a rooftop was not his number one pick in the past. Hey, doesn't mean he dislikes it though, far from it. Up here, it really feels like they escaped from some of the bullshit that happens around the city.
And heh, already ditched the secret identity thing, huh? Scott's tempted to tell Peter that he was pretty bad at it to begin with, but dude brought him lemonade and a sandwich, he owes him that much.]
Gwen's great man, you're definitely lucky. [...Of course, Scott considers himself the luckiest to be with Kotone, but he's a sap.] ...Kotone isn't a mutant like me, but she's made me feel less alone in this world.
[So, he sort of understands what Peter is saying??]
(both are saps, that's why a double date would kill the girls, and embarrass the boys. there's no doubt, though - both of them are lucky. they are two incredible women, and they are lame - no offense, scott.)
That's actually it, isn't it? I feel that here, too. The Avengers... They exist, and I'm sure they're not the only ones, but they're not super reachable, you know? It's not like I meet with Thor twice a week to assemble legos and stuff. So, it's just... Me. Here, it seems there are more people like us than not, so it makes me feel a little more, uh, you know. Normal.
People with powers? Yeah, definitely. [It's what definitely helped him adjust to this world, knowing there are other freaks like him. Maybe not mutants, but at that time, he didn't care. He still doesn't really care, even though he'll always be a little excited when another mutant shows up.]
I mean, I was starting to attend a school full of mutants and everything, but being here has made it feel like it'll be super easy going back to that. Like I'm fully used to assholes that can shoot webs or people that can fly. Honestly, I'm like an expert now.
Hah! See, that's the thing! All the Avengers are adults, too, so a school full of people like us? Can't imagine even if I tried really hard.
(but to be an expert in anything is quite a feat, he does find it cool that scott is so self-assured in this field. peter would still find anything incredible and insane - no matter how long he is here for.)
Hey, maybe you should open a school. Can everyone here control their powers?
Dude, I'm not setting up a school. I don't like going to school, why would I make others go?
[That would be such a blow to his reputation as well!! No longer the totally cool rebel that ditches class to take his friends out to the mall. He'd be some nerd instead and Scott simply can't let that happen. He finishes the rest of his lemonade before bonking his shoulders against Peter's, although there's suddenly some tension to the mutant as he brings up control and everything.
...Yeah.]
...Mostly, I'm pretty sure. [He tries to sound unaffected and cool. Scott mostly succeeds??] I think there's only a couple of us that can't.
(oh my god, are you seriously!!! school is important!!! the things he could accomplish if he knew physics, has he considered??? but he understands that it's not for everyone. he's thinking of MIT, so maybe he should do the school thing, except...)
I mean, I can't completely control everything, if I'm super honest.
[Sometimes he forgets that he hangs out with someone that runs a literal STEM club here.
But that admittance draws Scott's curiosity, his mouth parting slightly as he looks at his friend. When he said that only a couple of people can't control their powers, he literally meant that. Only him and Shinjiro have problems from what he knows.]
Really? It really feels like you have control over your powers man. Like your strength and the fact you can zip around the city with your webs.
[Which. Still is really cool and everything. He's a big fan.]
I mean, for the most part. We... Gwen and I, I mean. Spider-people. We have this, like, sixth sense type of thing going on. We can sense danger before it approaches, it's like a tingling sensation we get that tells us that something is not right and stuff. We can react to the thing even before we process it, but I can't always do that. Gotta concentrate real hard sometimes - and I can't always coordinate the sense with the reflexes, it's a whole thing, also the sensory stimulus sometimes can drive me crazy, but it really doesn't help that it feels like it's working overtime here, that sixth sense thing. We always feel like there's something off, and we can't pinpoint it.
[Seriously? Peter and Gwen has a power like that?? Something that informs them of danger before it happens? They really got a full packaged deal when bitten by that radioactive spider. He almost wants to say that this doesn't feel like a lack of control, maybe just inexperience or intuition, but he can tell that Peter is pretty bothered by this.
And so, he gets it.
Also, having that tingling feeling always going off in this place can't be fun. He understands that to some extent or just in a different way (not like his powers ever stop). Guess it also confirms that Aldrip is really fucked up, but he's always known that.]
...You can't just simply turn it off, right? It's a constant presence and so you can't fully relax.
Nope, it's like... When your phone is flashing the notification light but when you look at it, there's no notification, you know what I mean, right?-- wait, no, you don't. Think, uh, microwave, same idea, concept and all, it's beeping, but there's nothing in there for you to take out.
(sorry, he forgets the year difference, even with the tablets being a thing.
that said, scott hits it exactly on how he feels in aldrip. it's a perfect description of anxiety and an underlying concern that he can't do anything about.)
[Luckily, Scott catches on rather quickly with what Peter is trying to say. Guess he can thank the fact that he's been around pretty advanced tech now. Well, mostly the tablets.]
But seriously man, I get it. [Maybe not the anxiety part, but.] You know that my powers never turn off either, right? Like right now, they're hitting my glasses.
Not really headaches, but... there's like this constant presence in my head?
[It's not super uncomfortable or anything. Maybe he's just used to it though? At least it's not like the time when his optic blasts started developing, where his eyes were stinging and he had a full on headache.]
Like it's trying to remind me that my powers are always there. [To be careful. That he's not fully normal anymore. One slip up and he can seriously injure or kill others.]
(because he would easily say it could. imagine if your eyes threw lasers just for being open! does he see well? many things he wants to ask for science, but he will refrain for the time being.)
Sometimes? I mean, I'm kind of used to it by now. I had to adjust.
[He leans back on his hands, staring up at the sky with that forever red tint. Yeah, just something he's gotten used to. Sometimes it really bothers him, but those days are becoming more infrequent. They still happen, but usually he tries to remember some of the positives. Like being able to fight and protect his friends.] I don't want them to go away, despite the cons.
That's gotta be the spirit, man. What are we even going to do, right, vacuum clean our cells or something? Can't do, right? When you can do things we do, well, we can't just sit back. That's what I think, at least.
(but he understands the desire to not have to deal with it at all. not so much as it is, because the fact that he is who he is still awes him, inspires and makes him want to keep going, be better -- but he already knows how hard it is to have to leave so much behind to achieve that.)
no subject
one chance in fourteen million.)
I mean, man, it's a whole thing, scientifically and otherwise, right? But I get it, because you don't know where the similarities start and stop, so you gotta wonder what is happening around and what does that mean to you, is that what you've been thinking?
no subject
There's that grief though, knowing his friend is dead back home. Why can't things be better for his friends?? It really fucking sucks.]
Yeah, something like that. Especially if... like there's something you learn about the future in another world that you really don't like. [His frown increases despite himself. He... he doesn't want to kill Charles Xavier.]
no subject
so, if there's something about another world that he doesn't like...)
I mean, man. No story is finished telling, right? There's always hope for things to be better. Maybe you don't like it, and that's totally fine, right, but you don't know what will happen in the future of that future, so like, maybe it will all turn out okay, right?
-- That future of that future part didn't help my case, but you know what I mean. The super future--
You get it.
no subject
If he can, maybe Scott can. ...He should.
Even if he kills Professor Xavier, maybe... it will somehow still be okay. It feels grim, but guess the Scott in Quentin's timeline is trying his best. Finally, he breathes out, focusing on Peter with genuine curiosity.]
...Do you have hope for your future, Peter?
no subject
(perhaps a little more long-winded than he wanted to go with, but nevertheless, it's how he feels. he can't predict tomorrow, but he can hope. he can wake up each morning and try to help, make a difference, even if this is-- a videogame? a simulation? the people in here are real to him.
he can't turn his back to it.)
no subject
Those are really, really bad odds but guess they're not impossible odds either? If Peter still has hope for the future, even if he's not a part of it, then Scott isn't going to point out how slim that possibility is. Besides, Peter is the math nerd between them, he already knows and still chooses to believe and... he's a strong guy, isn't he? It's not because he's just Spider-Man either.
He bumps his shoulder against Peter's, a smile twitching at the corners of his mouth. Look, he really is in full agreement with him.]
It is worth something. Being here. Making friends with others.
[He fully believes it, he has to. All the friends he has here, his girlfriend... all that is truly worth something, even if it won't necessarily last forever. It still matters.] What we do here still matters.
no subject
he couldn't ever imagine himself.)
I think, so, too. If this is the only home I will ever get now, then I'll make it my home. It matters to me.
Cheers?
no subject
He holds up his lemonade, however, holding it up to Peter with a small smile. He'll get through his feelings and at the very least, support his friend. Make sure that he has a good time at this new 'home.' It matters to him too.]
Kind of prefer a lot of things in this new home anyway. Hot girlfriend and all.
[Peter understands.]
no subject
I mean, can't complain either, not by far. Gwen's, uh, pretty amazing. We already decided to stop trying to keep our identities to ourselves, so I can actually tell you she's also a Spider. I thought I was alone all this time, but I'm not. It's pretty sweet.
no subject
And heh, already ditched the secret identity thing, huh? Scott's tempted to tell Peter that he was pretty bad at it to begin with, but dude brought him lemonade and a sandwich, he owes him that much.]
Gwen's great man, you're definitely lucky. [...Of course, Scott considers himself the luckiest to be with Kotone, but he's a sap.] ...Kotone isn't a mutant like me, but she's made me feel less alone in this world.
[So, he sort of understands what Peter is saying??]
no subject
That's actually it, isn't it? I feel that here, too. The Avengers... They exist, and I'm sure they're not the only ones, but they're not super reachable, you know? It's not like I meet with Thor twice a week to assemble legos and stuff. So, it's just... Me. Here, it seems there are more people like us than not, so it makes me feel a little more, uh, you know. Normal.
no subject
People with powers? Yeah, definitely. [It's what definitely helped him adjust to this world, knowing there are other freaks like him. Maybe not mutants, but at that time, he didn't care. He still doesn't really care, even though he'll always be a little excited when another mutant shows up.]
I mean, I was starting to attend a school full of mutants and everything, but being here has made it feel like it'll be super easy going back to that. Like I'm fully used to assholes that can shoot webs or people that can fly. Honestly, I'm like an expert now.
no subject
(but to be an expert in anything is quite a feat, he does find it cool that scott is so self-assured in this field. peter would still find anything incredible and insane - no matter how long he is here for.)
Hey, maybe you should open a school. Can everyone here control their powers?
no subject
[That would be such a blow to his reputation as well!! No longer the totally cool rebel that ditches class to take his friends out to the mall. He'd be some nerd instead and Scott simply can't let that happen. He finishes the rest of his lemonade before bonking his shoulders against Peter's, although there's suddenly some tension to the mutant as he brings up control and everything.
...Yeah.]
...Mostly, I'm pretty sure. [He tries to sound unaffected and cool. Scott mostly succeeds??] I think there's only a couple of us that can't.
no subject
I mean, I can't completely control everything, if I'm super honest.
no subject
But that admittance draws Scott's curiosity, his mouth parting slightly as he looks at his friend. When he said that only a couple of people can't control their powers, he literally meant that. Only him and Shinjiro have problems from what he knows.]
Really? It really feels like you have control over your powers man. Like your strength and the fact you can zip around the city with your webs.
[Which. Still is really cool and everything. He's a big fan.]
no subject
(oh, he started, and he kept going.)
no subject
And so, he gets it.
Also, having that tingling feeling always going off in this place can't be fun. He understands that to some extent or just in a different way (not like his powers ever stop). Guess it also confirms that Aldrip is really fucked up, but he's always known that.]
...You can't just simply turn it off, right? It's a constant presence and so you can't fully relax.
no subject
(sorry, he forgets the year difference, even with the tablets being a thing.
that said, scott hits it exactly on how he feels in aldrip. it's a perfect description of anxiety and an underlying concern that he can't do anything about.)
no subject
But seriously man, I get it. [Maybe not the anxiety part, but.] You know that my powers never turn off either, right? Like right now, they're hitting my glasses.
no subject
(he just has to ask. sometimes, power does not equate the physical capabilities to handle it, right? he just has to wonder.)
no subject
[It's not super uncomfortable or anything. Maybe he's just used to it though? At least it's not like the time when his optic blasts started developing, where his eyes were stinging and he had a full on headache.]
Like it's trying to remind me that my powers are always there. [To be careful. That he's not fully normal anymore. One slip up and he can seriously injure or kill others.]
no subject
(because he would easily say it could. imagine if your eyes threw lasers just for being open! does he see well? many things he wants to ask for science, but he will refrain for the time being.)
no subject
[He leans back on his hands, staring up at the sky with that forever red tint. Yeah, just something he's gotten used to. Sometimes it really bothers him, but those days are becoming more infrequent. They still happen, but usually he tries to remember some of the positives. Like being able to fight and protect his friends.] I don't want them to go away, despite the cons.
[...] I'm a mutant.
[And he doesn't want to take that back.]
no subject
(but he understands the desire to not have to deal with it at all. not so much as it is, because the fact that he is who he is still awes him, inspires and makes him want to keep going, be better -- but he already knows how hard it is to have to leave so much behind to achieve that.)
(no subject)
(no subject)