[At this moment, he can't help but compare Mikey to Kotone. Didn't she feel like she had to be strong and dependable for her team all the time? Never breaking down in front of them because she felt that was necessary when it came to being a leader? She's truly gotten better now, but it has taken months to help her through that. He wonders if Mikey still feels the same way, or at least something similar.
He's sure Yu told him that it's fine to feel this way, but... maybe he needs to still hear it from others? From Scott?? There's definitely genuine worry that keeps Scott planted against the door, but also a familiar stubbornness, something that actually feels nice after the terrible crap with Phoenix.]
It's okay to me. [...] I... you know that you don't have to be strong all the time, not for me at least.
[Maybe bold to say since he was crying against Mikey not too long ago.]
(he's a wall, even if he has seen the consequences of what his way of thinking can do. he's been manipulated to the bone, sunk further and further into his own demise, and not a peep, not once has he uttered any requests for help.
against the back of scott's head, he might feel manjiro's own setting against the wood, a sniffle, another one, as he tries to dry his cheeks, un-ugly his face, he's definitely not a pretty cryer.)
I know. It's just not who I am. It's... Hard, to be seen. I'm sure all the leaders you know are like that, too.
[Even though Mikey is physically closer, Scott still feels distant from him. Funny that a stupid door is keeping them separate, although, that's not really the cause, is it?]
Yeah, Kotone, Yu. Minato.
[Probably some others, but those are some names that immediately pop into his mind.]
But they've also learned to rely on others too, ask for help. They just don't face this alone.
[Maybe he's speaking for Yu and Minato, but he knows this is true for Kotone at least. He was there for that entire development, after all. He never wants her to feel alone like that again, because he loves her. But he also doesn't want Mikey to feel that way too, because he cares about him. Even if it's not with him, maybe Yu can be that person.]
(... it's baby steps, for all of them, he supposes.
there is a piercing silence that permeates for a while, not a sound that manjiro makes for the longest time until the creaking of the door slowly opening announces that he is trying, too. he does feel defeated, it is in his expression, with puffy eyes and the reddest nose, and in the way he closes it before sitting on the floor next to scott, taking a righteous place on his neck and collarbone.
[A silent hope starts building in his chest when the door opens, Scott looking up from his spot on the ground to look at the worn out figure of his friend. He's not sure if he's seen him this defeated before and broken down before. It was always obvious that the biker was crying in the bathroom, but seeing the traces of it is a painful affirmation that only makes the mutant want to reach out more.
Luckily, he doesn't say anything. More words at this point would be too much, right? It's already a large step for Mikey to let himself be seen like this.
So, Scott quietly just wraps his arms around his friend, letting him bury his face against available neck. He's long grown past feeling embarrassed about this kind of thing. Not to mention that supporting Mikey is far more important. Just like how a lot of his friends originally helped him through so much shit, it's time for him to return that favor.]
(it's both comfortable and ridiculously painful to be here. it's warm, and he feels the embrace and the care, the safety, and yet, he hates that he allows himself to accept it. he shouldn't, he couldn't, but he's here either way. his feet moved on their own, almost like his body knew he needed it - how many timelines has he denied himself that? how many decades, how many years, how much strength does he have to swallow his burdens and fight alone?
he doesn't know if his mother would be proud or disappointed. he doesn't want to speak, and he realizes that there's no intention from scott to do so either. there's a lot of hesitance in his hand, does it take the other boy's, does it not, back, forth, until he does.
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He's sure Yu told him that it's fine to feel this way, but... maybe he needs to still hear it from others? From Scott?? There's definitely genuine worry that keeps Scott planted against the door, but also a familiar stubbornness, something that actually feels nice after the terrible crap with Phoenix.]
It's okay to me. [...] I... you know that you don't have to be strong all the time, not for me at least.
[Maybe bold to say since he was crying against Mikey not too long ago.]
no subject
against the back of scott's head, he might feel manjiro's own setting against the wood, a sniffle, another one, as he tries to dry his cheeks, un-ugly his face, he's definitely not a pretty cryer.)
I know. It's just not who I am. It's... Hard, to be seen. I'm sure all the leaders you know are like that, too.
no subject
Yeah, Kotone, Yu. Minato.
[Probably some others, but those are some names that immediately pop into his mind.]
But they've also learned to rely on others too, ask for help. They just don't face this alone.
[Maybe he's speaking for Yu and Minato, but he knows this is true for Kotone at least. He was there for that entire development, after all. He never wants her to feel alone like that again, because he loves her. But he also doesn't want Mikey to feel that way too, because he cares about him. Even if it's not with him, maybe Yu can be that person.]
no subject
there is a piercing silence that permeates for a while, not a sound that manjiro makes for the longest time until the creaking of the door slowly opening announces that he is trying, too. he does feel defeated, it is in his expression, with puffy eyes and the reddest nose, and in the way he closes it before sitting on the floor next to scott, taking a righteous place on his neck and collarbone.
not a word.)
no subject
Luckily, he doesn't say anything. More words at this point would be too much, right? It's already a large step for Mikey to let himself be seen like this.
So, Scott quietly just wraps his arms around his friend, letting him bury his face against available neck. He's long grown past feeling embarrassed about this kind of thing. Not to mention that supporting Mikey is far more important. Just like how a lot of his friends originally helped him through so much shit, it's time for him to return that favor.]
no subject
he doesn't know if his mother would be proud or disappointed. he doesn't want to speak, and he realizes that there's no intention from scott to do so either. there's a lot of hesitance in his hand, does it take the other boy's, does it not, back, forth, until he does.
... and he sleeps. he's exhausted. it's a lot.)